Hiding

I recently heard a story of a husband who found out he was in debt. That’s right — he found out. His wife had a credit card that he didn’t know about.

Sounds pretty bad, uh? Woman spending money on shoes and such.

But what was she buying. Shoes? Clothes? Gourmet lunches?

Things her family needed, actually. As it turns out, fault lies on both sides of the line. He had a problem with money. He wouldn’t buy things for the family that they needed, things like school supplies. She, on the other hand, had a credit card that he didn’t know about.

One night he came home before her and opened a bank statement with her name on it. Needless to say, he found out, and wasn’t happy. She went to bed first that night (a highly peculiar act for her). It makes me think about what they did that went so wrong. What compelled her to hide things from her husband? Was she tricked by Satan? What did he do to lose her trust?

Why did things go so wrong?

My idea of a marriage is two people sharing everything with each other. Their meals, fights, finances, and sexuality are all shared between each other. Marriage is a process of continually SUBMITTING yourself to the other person, and dangerous things can happen when submitting is forgotten (or forsaken, for that matter).

So, what compelled her to lie (not sharing is a lie) to her husband? I think a large majority of the problem has to do with him. He is the leader of his family, but more than that, who’s fault is it if someone doesn’t want to approach him? His! If she fears approaching him, it is likely that he’s done something (or many things) in the past to discourage it. Maybe he has a habit of getting grumpy when finances are brought up. Maybe he has gotten angry — or even worse: ignored the situation.

It is the man’s job to submit himself to his wife and family by confronting problems head on, and providing for his family in all forms.

And her sin? Dishonesty, of course. But also lack of courage. Despite what people think, it is not just up to a man to keep a relationship together; it takes the work of both. And it’s not just the man that can lead; women can lead too. We are all human, and sometimes we need someone to help us along. For a man, that person should be his wife.

So much depends on submitting to one another. This couple didn’t do it, and now I have a feeling they’re going to pay for it. Submit to each other by being honest about your finances. It really is the best way.